(from the moon series)
What exactly hurts so bad?
Because you’re okay in the moment.
It’s just when you look ahead
that your chest tightens.
It’s just when you start imagining
the hot days of June and the nostalgic
days of April. It’s just an overworked
mind playing time against reality and losing.
It’s just worry and hunger and expectation
and fatigue and happiness like a wedding party
at a reception inverted. It’s just sadness you can avoid
by escaping into spirituality. Spiritual escapism? Hm.
It’s just Saturday night in the bus station with ten thousand faces
walking by, none of which you know. It’s just the moon in orbit, as usual,
that you keep envisioning. Envisioning careening off path, careening away
and so you struggle to hold on. You fight to keep it, you push against movement
and you know it’s a futile revolution.
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