Limericks
Some go up to their cats and pucker,
Let them lick their lips like a sucker,
Though no one sees what goes on
When the guests are all gone,
Do those people become a cat fucker?
On the way to the old corner store,
The drunk stumbled into a whore.
He said, “How much for head?”
“Thirty,” she said.
So he cursed and bought some liquor.
There once was a guy named Ben,
Who had a bi-girlfriend.
When they finally broke up
She said, “Enough is enough.”
And became a full lesbian.
When I think of old Goldy Locks,
It feels like I’ve eaten some rocks.
Innocent as a kid,
Look what she went and did,
Starred in a porn with three cocks.
Matt had muscles made of rock,
And hair with gorgeous blonde locks.
Spent all his time in the gym
And when it came to women,
His weakest muscle – his cock.
For a bike chain one must oil it,
And for a Lobster one must boil it.
As for meditating,
Grandpa, without hesitating,
said, “I meditate while I sit on the toilet.”
Epigram
At intermission when the music just ends,
At the symphony is my favorite part.
When from the high class ladies and men,
You can hear them all belch and fart.
What hath thy begot !
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